Monday, November 28, 2016
We all tried, we really did. Roger and I are both very quiet, self-contained people. We can spend hours and hours directing our attention to things that interest us: gardening, photography, backyard birds, sun and moon rises and sets, atmospheric optics, cooking and baking. Most of these things are done with hardly a word spoken, but just single-minded intent to get things done. It didn't occur to us that ongoing conversation would be an integral part of my mother's happiness. And really, even though we know now, we still don't have that much to say. See, I'm happily typing this, and I'm not saying a word out loud. Not a good thing for my mom who needs way more stimulation than either one of us could offer.
So, on December 10 my sister is flying up from southern California, and the two of them are heading back on the 13th. My mom is moving into an assisted living facility that's only 1.7 miles from my sister's house, much closer than the previous facility. We're all hoping this will be a good move for her, that she will be more socially engaged and stimulated there. I told her that it's probably a good idea for her to play with people her own age. We both laughed.
This not how we thought it would go, but this is how it's going. I have a whole new respect for people who can live multi-generationally and do it successfully. I once believed that that was how it "should" be. Now I'm pretty convinced it most definitely is not. Not anymore. Not the way we do it in the modern world. Not in these times of the broken vestiges of the ancient human family. It doesn't work.
Posted by robin andrea at 12:00 AM