Wednesday, March 11, 2020

A Change In Plans

We were supposed to be on the road today on the first leg of our journey south for our nephew's wedding in southern California this Saturday. It's a 700 mile (1126 km) drive. Yes, a very long drive, the one we used to do so often to see my mom. The plan was for us to spend the first night at my twin brother and SIL's  house, and then the four of us make the drive together. But we're not on the road. We're staying home for two important reasons. One is the coronavirus. We are of the age group most at risk and really did not look forward to stopping at rest areas and using public restrooms. Ugh. We would be driving straight into the areas hardest hit in California (so far) by the virus. Ugh. And then, when we made it to southern California we would be gathering with 200 other guests, eating food, touching the same utensils, and hugging people. Ugh. So, I had to call my nephew and tell him the sad news. He was so disappointed, but he completely understood the rationale of our decision-making.

The other reason we're staying home is because Roger has not been well for a couple of weeks now. He's had strange persistent symptoms of dizziness, light-headedness, and unsteadiness while walking. All very troubling. He had an echocardiogram to see if his aortic stenosis had worsened, but it hadn't (YAY!). So, he's waiting to hear from our doc to see what he should do next. He also has eye issues that are utterly distracting. His left eye is giving him so much pain and discomfort and has become so light sensitive, the brightest sunniest days are the worst. Driving south, straight into the sun would have been torture.

So instead we're home wondering how long all this craziness is going to last. We feel so bad about not going. We know we made the right decision, but still it's heartbreaking. What would you have done?

Well, you know me, I'm still checking the skies for splendor, and sometimes it gives me the ephemeral beauty of iridescence for my persistence. This was Monday's gift.

32 comments:

  1. I can understand your reluctance to go, my wife does not want me to help out at an event next week and I will probably take her advise because the last one I did I picked up something which is still hanging around. Sorry to hear of Rodgers problem and I hope he gets over it, puts my sciatica and back problems in the dark but then I did dig out a pond the other day so only have myself to blame. Off down to Wales now 150 mile drive to set up the caravan then coming home later. PS don't worry about the virus, what will be will be and your more likely to be got by the flu

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    1. Billy-- I'm glad you're taking your wife's advice and not going to help out an event next week. Avoiding crowds is the best way to stay healthy these days. Sciatica is pretty painful too, hope that feels better soon.

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  2. Sorry about the problems, but prudence pays. We've scuttled a trip to the PNW for the same COVID-19 reason this year. I hope the old pirate gets better (though an eye patch would be dashing).

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    1. Paul-- I told the old pirate he should get an eye patch as well. Yes, he'd be dashing!

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  3. I think you made the right decision. Yes, it's difficult disappointing other people, but how bad would your relatives feel if you did actually catch the virus as a result of the trip? I'm a bit stunned that my 80 year old mother is off to Sri Lanka and Singapore in a week's time. She was booked to go on the Silver Princess but the company cancelled the trip (much to her annoyance) and organised an alternative. I think she's nuts going anwhere but she has travelled all over the world all her life and the threat of a virus won't stop her. I half expect her stubbornness to be her undoing but I have to respect her choice.

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    1. Dr Michelle-- I am so surprised that your mom wants to travel to Sri Lanka and Singapore. Her age puts her so much at risk. I hope it all goes well for her. I do admire her tenacity.

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  4. Oh I definitely think you made the right choice. I was supposed to go to North Carolina next week for a family gathering, and we canceled the whole thing. At this point, I’m reluctant to go anywhere unnecessary. I had pneumonia twice last winter, so I’m sure I’m on the coronavirus vulnerable list. Unfortunately my significant other still needs to travel for his work, so we all hope for the best.

    I hope Roger gets some answers to his problems. Interesting that you also experienced dizziness recently. My daughter had the same issues with both eyes not long ago. She was complaining of pain and sensitivity to light. It seemed to resolve before she went to the doctor, but we still don’t know what it was. I thought maybe some sort of optical migraine. Keep us posted.

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    1. Sharon-- Good decision to cancel that family gathering. I hope this pandemic goes by quickly enough that you can plan for that gathering soon. Roger's light-headedness comes when he does physical exertion. It first started when he was cleaning up the garage about a month ago. Since then we've noticed that when we're out walking he gets light-headed (not exactly dizzy) and sometimes he stumbles and his gait changes. It's weird. We thought it might be his aortic stenosis getting symptomatic, but it seems not be. We're wondering if he should get a CT scan. His eyes have been sensitive for a long time. it's just gotten really really bad.

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  5. You did the right thing to stay home. Some of the things we will have to do will hurt but we don't want to get the virus or spread it.

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    1. Red-- Yes, I believe you are absolutely right about that.

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  6. I believe you did the right thing for your sake and theirs. I made my sisters put off our sister's get together for this month for they would have flown. I told them I wouldn't forgive myself if they got sick.
    I do so hope Roger finds out what the problems are and that he finds an easy fix. Please let us know.

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    1. Patti-- Oh absolutely do not get on a plane. Good idea to put off that get together. Thank you for your kind words about Roger. We're worried, but persistent.

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  7. I don't think you really had any choice. You and I are in one of the at-risk groups (elderly? who me?), so staying away from large groups is definitely in line with recommendations. But even aside from that, it would not have been very pleasant for Roger to make that trip. So, it was the smart thing to do.

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    1. Mark-- Oh yes, we are definitely of an age that is the most at risk. It's such a bummer to have to think about it every time we go out. Roger is going to be 78 on his next birthday in August. So, it is truly worrisome.

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  8. I think it makes sense for you to stay home, for all the reasons you've mentioned. I'm glad your nephew understood. I know it's disappointing for you but you're being smart.

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    1. Steve-- He really did understand. We had such a funny conversation about it. He was wondering why he and his partner even decided to have such a big crazy wedding. We laughed and laughed.

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  9. Good choice. Time to be a bit isolationist and keep in good health, whatever that may be. I had some light-headedness for a while, and never got diagnosed...maybe it's an unknown condition going around! Hope Roger feels better soon.

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    1. Barbara-- I'm a bit of an isolationist even on a good healthy day, so this is pretty easy for me. LOL! I think our biggest concern about Roger's light-headedness is that it has been going on for a month now, and that he also has some balance issues when we're walking,. It's scary.

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  10. Sounds like a wise decision to me, who knows where this thing is going? If I'm honest I'd be looking for any excuse not to have to travel 700 miles as I hate sitting in cars - eating food and hugging people is fine though!
    I hope Roger is able to get this problem sorted out as soon as possible.

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    1. John-- These 700 miles are pretty challenging too. First for the many miles of winding roads through redwood country, and then smack into the congested San Francisco bay area, and then on to the most traffic of all places southern California. Ugh. Yes, hugging people is really the good part.

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  11. You made the right decision. I'm sorry you'll miss the fun, though.

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    1. Colette-- I think we did make the right decision, but some family members are not too happy about it. Who would have ever expected a pandemic? Not me.

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  12. That's too bad about the wedding, but I think you made a wise decision to stay home. It's a long way and with Roger not feeling that well, staying home is prudent. Add to that the risk of Covid. We don't really know where it is going from here. Just remind your nephew to take plenty of photos and video (I'm sure they will) and it will be almost like being there. The lightheadedness and balance problems might be a virus or something similar. So many odd things going around these days.

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    1. bev-- My twin brother and SIL are going, so they're going to take lots of video and pics for us. I feel bad about disappointing people, but damn it's a long way to go during a pandemic. Not sure about Roger's health, but it sure would nice if there were really good doc somewhere these days.

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  13. Sorry about your cancellation but I think you made the wise choice.

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    1. Catalyst-- I think we did too, sad as it is.

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  14. As you must know I am eighty-four and VR is just eighty - both of us well beyond the point of starting to recognise that irreversible changes are occurring in our bodies and that things are never going to be same again. And not in a good way. This you will know about even if - I hope - you haven't yet experienced it. What will be unfamiliar is that you may also find yourself beginning to live two corporeal lives - one defined by your own body and one by that of your partner. Thus when your beloved other rises with difficulty from a chair you will eventually know how and why those difficulties occur. It seems like a bad thing but there is an upside: such knowledge becomes a form of sympathy and in our case at least it brings us, as a couple, closer. And at a time when closeness becomes ever more important. I hope to hell I have not painted too gloomy a picture but I for one appreciate this phenomenon.

    Those long US journeys. Such memories. How gaily we used to embark on the drive from Dormont, a Pittsburgh suburb, to visit friends in Holliston, an outer suburb of Boston,Mass. Google tells me this is only a mere 560.6 miles (a stroll in the garden lasting 9 hours) but the route shown takes in, I think, the Pennsylvania Turnpike which we used to avoid - a crude, antiquated, highly curvaceous road which I imagine has been greatly improved during the intervening fifty years. Our preferred route went north to the Interstate; then mile after mile of virgin forest where VR once saw a bear at the side of the road. I wouldn't want to tackle that in one day.

    For the last decade we've rented a villa in southern France, near Béziers. From Hereford (using the Channel Tunnel) it's 897 miles, taking 15 hr 19 min. Two days, sharing the driving and diving straight through Paris (a great stimulant!). I think you made the right decision.

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    1. Roderick-- Oh we are definitely headed in that direction. Long before you and I started reading each other's blogs, ten years ago, Roger was diagnosed with colon cancer. He was 67 years old (the age I am now), and it upended our lives for a while. Surgery and chemo, and the whole shebang. Here we are ten years later, in these aging bodies watching and feeling our bodies decline into the chaos of their cellular whims. We keep an eye on things, but one never knows what's coming next.

      Yes, there was a time when we could get into a car and drive 500 miles without even thinking about now. Those days are long gone. And to be perfectly honest, I'm beginning to think if I can't get there by walking, I really don't want to go.

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  15. Sending positive vibes for Roger's health. The decision was a no-brainer in view of Roger's undiagnosed medical status much less the virus concerns. I'm sure your presence will be missed but equally sure they will understand. I hope Roger finds relief soon.

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    1. NCmountainwoman-- We're so glad that we made the choice we made. My twin brother is driving down to the wedding and is full of concern. He's not going to stay for the dinner after the ceremony. Our governor has said that any gatherings over 250 should be postponed or cancelled, and for smaller gatherings people should maintain 6 feet of distance between them. Not very fun for a wedding.

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  16. Yes, good call guys.
    Interesting image. It's a rainbow corona!

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    1. sarah toa-- I had been thinking about the colors in this cloud formation and wondering if it was a corona and not iridescence. Yes, I think you are right. Thank you for confirming that. So good to hear from you.

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